eMpTy scrapbook

blehhhhhhhh
suddenly feel so bad for criticizing ppl behind their backs....
especially since I....who is always eager to share information i know and express my opinion......
[but no worries.....i don say wat im not supposed to....]
it makes me feel as low as those bitch tht embrace backstabbing as their career or even pleasure....god knows wat they gain from this backstabbing
*sigh*
i've always known tht there are these 'batu api' tht exist around us....
well there is bound to be......
but 'unfortunately' GOD has never let me experience the cruelty of these ppl to prepare me against another of their kind
though HE has gifted me with the good sense of avoiding conflicts with these ppl...
well maybe this good sense comes from getting bullied in kindergarden......and......my first n 2nd year in primary school......

not until recently did i have some stronger opinion about these kind of ppl....
it's not like the problem wasnt there all along.....
it's tht i juz realised tht other than a few ppl close to me....i m not the only one who feels the insincerity of ppl of those kind....

wat i feel is...
why do these ppl hav to make ppl around them uncomfortable?
and to an extent despise them?
i mean...arent they tired of it?
why cant they juz be themselves?

frankly, i expect ppl to be true to themselves...
why pretend to like me when they actually dont?
and the most important part is i don really care wat they do......
but these ppl make me feel insincere too when i interact with them....
*scowling*
well bcoz i know they are not sincere but i have no choice but to reply with the same degree of insincerity......

half of my 1-month holiday is gone...
well it's typical of me not to use the time of my holidays wisely...as is the habit of a lazy bum...
haha

rite..i'll be frank..
i spend my days reading novels [yea..those 400-page-romance-novels of english lords n damsels in distress]..watching tv..n pretty much SLEEP
i finished 4 books in one week...
rite..not very impressive speed but crazy enuf for me..cuz sometimes i read until dawn n then go to sleep when i think my parents are up..
so i wake at noon or sometimes later than tht...
yes...tht's the time i wake up every day...
though sometimes it's not bcoz of reading...it could b tv...

speaking of tv my sis went n borrow {All About Eve} from my aunt n we watched the whole thing in 2 days...
20 cds..
but of course...half of the time we watch it in fast forward...cuz those are hated scenes...
ah..it's an old Korean drama from the year 2000...main actor is the famous Jang Dong Geon aka 张东健
and i still love it...it's a gud drama...haha

n tell u wat..
all those love from the novels n drama has had an effect on me ><
cuz i wonder when i'll experience it myself...
hahahahaha...
it'd be nice to finally know wat all those love songs are singing about, wouldnt it?

xxx

spent 2 nights in Genting wif classmates the week after exams..
lazy so never blogged about it...
it was a fun trip...
nth out of the ordinary except tht guys n gals share rooms...
n we played games till 4 a.m.
on the 2nd night i got to b the mafia for a record-breaking 10 times in the mafia game [wat luck!]
n i got to play snooker for the first time..
i believe tht if i hav practice i'd be a gud shot..
hehe no kidding
it was a week b4 MTV Asia Awards [held at Genting] n i saw posters everywhere n then i immediately thought of Super Junior...they won the Korean Favourite Artist award by the way...
n i so damn wished i was there a week later to catch a glimpse of them...haha
i heard they were passing out free tickets b4 the show started T_T
man..i'd die [ahem..figuratively speaking] to go c them perform live!! for free summore!!
Only 13! Fighting!

WARNING: today's post no substance....

yay! juz finished exams...
sent sms to a few frens tell them call me anytime go ‘饮茶’...
mana tau Bro reply me 'wat de hell...'
SIAO...say my phone too much credit....
yala yala...i got too much credit....=.=

ah...i hope i get high distinction for finite maths & study skills...
but then SUSAH lah....if maths wanna get HD then i shud get full marks 40 for this exam...
study skills not easy oso...gotta have at least 32 marks...
anyway...exams over...y fret?
haha....but i got confidence...can score!!
*cross my fingers*

aiya...hope english n computing principles can get distinction oso...
oso not easy....english muz get more than 30, computing muz get more than 32
die lah....silap-silap hari bulan will get credit leh.....
haha...but one of my ex-classmates once told me...
'aim for the best, prepare for the worst.....'
tht means gotta hope can get high marks, but gotta b prepared to get low marks
wise words...hehe
anyway....i did my best

cut my hair a few hours ago....
took a picture of myself before tht....haha...cuz it's unlikely tht i'll b having such long hair again...well at least not in the near future...
i don hav pretty hair...summore no money do stuff like hair treatment or rebonding or whatever they do to their hair to make it look shiny n straight...haha
so it's not really nice having it too long....

by the way...anybody knows how i can watch drama online?
Japanese drama...with subs...
cuz i think the 求婚大作战 currently showing on Sundays 3pm on 8tv is pretty interesting...
but it only shows one episode per week!!!
wat a torture...
ah...the main character is played by a member of NEWS...dunno his name...
anyway...not important

안녕

初中一的时候，我坐在班上的最后一排。没有半年，发觉有位同学，每隔几分钟，就会转过头来瞄我一眼。我想我不用多说，你也猜到是怎么回事了。当时我假装不知道，以为这样就可以逃过一劫。可是，还是逃不掉。他竟然在同学面前承认，他喜欢我。

从此之后， all hell broke loose.

我本来可以不把他当回事，照常生活。可是无论我去到学校的哪一个角落，他都会在附近，留意着我的一举一动。甚至我走路回家，他都会跟着。每天放学后，我都会一支箭飞回家。 但他总是跟上我的脚步。所以，足足两年的时间，我每天放学，就有一种在跟他赛跑的感觉。因此我之所以走路这么快，还得谢谢他。。。

你说，他是不是一个名副其实的stalker?

庆幸的是，初中一后，我跟他不再同班。然而，上课之前学校集会，我总是感觉得到，他在隔壁班的队伍，盯着我看。而且，我若排在后面，他原本排在前面，也会想办法和别人换位，以便他看得到我。总之，他的班如果在我右边，我打死都不会往那方向看，以免看到他那惹人厌的样子。其实，这还不是最令我反胃的原因。这位同学，是个无可救药的缩头乌龟！有胆跟踪人，没胆面对人。每当我注意到他的存在，他整个人就真的会缩起来，然后马上消失在我面前。没出息。

更有一次，他趁运动会，带了相机去学校。我本来真的不知道的，但我留意到，他的相机其实是朝着我的方向在拍。或许，我自己“多心”。可是，运动会结束后，我在一间教室外面等朋友，发现他在隔壁教室的门后，偷拍我！可惜，我没证据证明。

其实，我那时已经不在乎，也放下了他对我造成的精神上的困扰。我只是生气，他那所谓的“爱”。事实上，我跟他，从来都没有讲过话。他，除了是一个陌生的同校同学之外，什么都不是。我甚至可以说，我是完全不认识他的。所以，他根本就不清楚我的为人，怎么称得上“喜欢”我？难道他认为，他这样每天观察我，就会知道我是一个怎样的人吗？真是异想天开！我想，他想象中的那个我，根本就不存在。那只不过是他自己制造的假象罢了。

没有人了解，我有许多的不忿！
我就被他这份不切实际的“爱”，缠了那么久！

后来，有人告诉我，他喜欢上另一个人。 可是我仍然感觉得到，他有在观察我。这可能真的是我自己想太多，可是直觉告诉我，我没有错。

毕业时，最开心的事，就是从此以后，再也不用见到他。我知道，我没有必要讨厌这个人，可是我真的希望，我永远都不会再遇到他。

Jon is the fren who understands me the most
of course i, in turn, am the fren who understands him the most..

i feel like i've known him forever, but in truth we were only classmates since form 1..
n got close in form 3..[bcoz we joined choir together??...not sure..]
tht time he started calling me 'jie'...like im his elder sis or wat...
though in truth he is a month older than me =.=
n of course in form 3, there was this gang of 6 'siao' frens..
Jon, Mel, Min, Qin, Xuan n Mt...
i especially rmb the time when we used to form a 'study group' rite b4 PMR n stayed back in school to 'study'...
haha
n then there was Kem Kepimpinan...
Jon n i talked for hours on the bus...both on the way there n back...
tht really got us closer...
then the 1st day of school in form 5, i got him to sit next to me...
since Xuan n Qin were surely going to stick together n i'd be the odd one out...haha
since then we have talked about anything n everything..
sometimes we don even have to say anything to noe wat the other is thinking...
it'd b really weird if there was a day when we don get wat each other was saying...
im serious..
haha

in form 3, he had some family problems..
after tht, he started to depend on his frens...
this is why he loves them so much...
though i muz say tht sometimes, he depends too much on us!
i personally think tht Jon cannot live without the love of his family n frens...[n dogs?]
he can never be lonely...he'll die of it...

i guess Jon trusted me, enuf to tell me the reason behind his family problems...
i still think im the only fren he told...[or am i??]
this is why im confident to say tht im a trustworthy fren...
Jon gave me tht confidence...

im grateful for his trust in me, n the friendship we have...
so i hope he will still share his troubles n burdens wif me...
wish i could hav a long chat wif him...especially since i noe tht sth happened lately... or tht sth is bound to happen...

anyway, love you Jon....
[though i hate u when u study last minute n yet can still be better than average!!]

in lab now
n man....i feel crappy

gotta hand in the excel document nex week
aiya..watever...juz gotta do some calculations n budgeting stuff based on the business proposal last time...
havent started
plan to come to college tmr to do wif frens...
but a lot of classmates have started...giving me stress
n i've juz wasted 2 hours here...
damn

summore...i thought i noe wat to do...
now i'm not sure anymore...

sigh

i've never mentioned this in my blog...
but a lot of ppl noe this..
i m a HUGE FAN of DONG BANG SHIN KI & SUPER JUNIOR
yes, tht is why u c some weird language in my blog...it's korean
i've watched too many videos of them tht i noe some simple words in korean

haha..i'd bet nobody wanna noe how i became a fan
or why i became a fan..
cuz i can go on for hours if anyone is willing to listen to me babble about my idols..
there are 18 of them, for god's sake

haha, suddenly remembered tht a group of my frens, fellow fans of DBSK...
didn't like it tht i was also a fan of SuJu..
they said it's not loyal =.=
it's gud tht they r loyal towards DBSK, but it juz sounds illogical to me...
haha, these frens r juz cute

oh, n for the record, i don hav any favourite members...
i love them equally...

aiya...dunno y i started to write about this already...
but recently got addicted to 2 songs:



hoho..this is Super Junior Happy, a sub-group of Super Junior [don ask]
it's juz a cute song....
cant bliv they can write a song about girlfriend dunno how to cook....hahahahah



n this is Epik High - One
great song, the mv says it all....
they seriously remind me of Linkin Park...not in terms of the genre, but how they express their feelings n stuff via their music

oh, juz click n watch if u wan....
no worries, both videos are complete wif english subs